Relationships are A LOT of hard work. And if you haven?t already been in one, you will eventually end up in one?a relationship, that is. There is no hiding the fact that most relationships end up in divorce today more than ever (I think the statistics are something like over 50%). With divorce rates so high, some people may wonder, ?well, what?s the point of getting married or involved seriously then anyway?? The truth of the matter is that any and every good relationship takes work; but sadly, most Americans want things to be ridiculously easy and so when they?re not, they simply move on.
One of the biggest and most commonly seen mistakes that couples make when getting involved in a relationship is that they jump into it without having been friends first. Why is being ?friends? so critical to the success of a relationship? Well, there?s a saying which states that you can?t build something unless you have a solid foundation first. For romantic, life-long relationships to survive, friendship has to be that solid foundation. It is during the time when two people are friends that they get to know one another better and find out common likes and dislikes, etc. You learn to appreciate the other person during this time to find out whether or not you are compatible. Too many people jump into the romantic part of relationships for the excitement and thrill, only to realize that after all of that has worn off, they aren?t really left with much else.
When I first started dating my current boyfriend of over 1 year, we were friends first. We shared a lot of the same interests and genuinely enjoyed each others company. There are some people who get along fabulously in a long term relationship (ie. Marriage) after only knowing each other a short while. However, there is a saying that says something to the effect that if your foundation is built in sand, it will never last. That being said, the same is true of relationships. If your relationship is built upon lust or some other falsity, it will never withstand the storms that can sometimes rock and test relationships. Take time to get to know someone. The last thing you want to find out just after you?re married is that the other person has a ton of financial trouble or that something else more serious is going on. By building a relationship on friendship first, you are starting out on a much more solid foundation.
Some studies advise that a couple should date for at least two to three years prior to becoming engaged and/or married so that they have this time to get to know one another. Part of the reason that a lot of marriages don?t work out is also due to the media?s portrayal of what love is. On television as well as in other media forms, love is portrayed romantically and/or passionately only. Seldom do you see two people portrayed who are enjoying one another?s company. Instead, you see two people falling madly in love, and then you cut to six months later when they are engaged and another 6 months later where they are married. We really need to refocus our energies when it comes to making relationships work so that they will be healthier and longer-lasting.
Source: http://www.daddysart.com/relationships-are-hard-work.html
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